This reminds me of the safety procedures announced before an airplane takes off, “be sure to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before putting your child’s mask on”. Parents always want what’s best for their kids, however if we as adults are not yet emotionally complete how can we help them to be? Children face many emotionally challenging events, and the best place to start is to make sure we are able to help them in every way possible. Only by taking care of ourselves first can we make this happen.
One way is to consider forgiving the person who has hurt us. Forgiveness does not mean we approve of what someone did, or condone it. It simply means that we are choosing to let go of the pain associated with the hurt. Waiting for the offender to apologize is often a trap in itself, as we are giving our power to someone else in hopes that they will say “I’m sorry” first. That may or may not happen over time, and we are truly taking action toward healing if we can let go of the pain first. Only then can we teach our children to do the same!